15 Ways to Deal with Angry People
People feel and show their anger in various ways. Some people pout, some withdraw, and some scream, shout, insult, and swear. Sound familiar? Today, we are going to recommend 15 ways how to deal with angry people:
1. Remember: We Can’t Control Everything and Everyone
Just let go of the idea that you can have control over people’s behavior. There is no way to help some people who get angry all the time. Remember, that only the owner can change their behavior. You can just encourage them.
2. Is the Anger Rational
At times anger is completely justified and reasonable, and you should always take into account how the other person feels. But, no matter how justified the anger is, the person should not express it in an unjustified way.
Ask why they are angry, are you the reason, and how can you help them. If you are the reason, you can apologize, but if they speak to you with a higher tone, you can still say that you do not appreciate their behavior.
3. Act Calm
An essential thing is to stay, or at least act calmly in a situation when someone is angry. You should not yell, swear, or insult. When we speak slowly and calmly, the chances of making it worse are lower.
4. Avoid Insults
If you allow yourself to attack someone’s character, the situation is going to get much worse. So, do not do that. Instead of “You regularly yell,” try saying “Please, do not yell.” Or, instead of “You are so impatient,” try saying, “Can you be patient, please.”
5. Know When to Back Off
When you are in a situation with an angry person, you should know when to back off. By disengaging from the situation you are staying safe, and avoiding making it worse. You can say, for example, “Let’s talk about this when we are calmer.”
6. Prepare Yourself
According to new research, the state of mind in which someone is when listening to an angry person has an effect on the possibility of getting upset.
So, when someone is yelling at you, you should tell yourself that this person got some bad news and is now taking it all out on you, or they are overwhelmed by something happening in their life.
7. Choose Your Battles
Never waste your time or energy to prove something to someone who is totally angry. They are not realistic at that stage. Talk when they get calmer.
8. Acknowledge Their Anger
When you let a person who is angry know that you understand their feelings, you get a chance for a more mature conversation. You can say, for example, “I understand how you feel.”
9. Give Them Space
You should stay away from the argument, and leave the person to cool off even before the situation gets worse. Stay away before you exchange some tough words.
10. Set Your Boundaries
You need to set your boundaries and be firm and set up some consequences if the situation gets out of control. For instance, all the family is going to move out for a few days, and leave them alone. It is not an easy alternative, but the problem is not easy too.
11. Write a Letter
When you feel like the person is going to interrupt you when you try speaking to them, you should write a letter. Think about the things, and express your opinion on paper.
12. Make a List of Everything That Makes Them Angry
This may sound strange, but it is useful and fun too. Make a list of all the things that make the other person angry. You will be surprised when you see how ridiculous things there can be. Then, show the list to the person, and ask them if that is all or if there is something more. This will open their eyes.
13. Protect Yourself
You need to protect yourself from being physically hurt because angry people know to lose control. When you deal with an angry person, try to find out what is making them angry. If you know what the source is, you can be able to deal with it.
14. Use Other People to Help You
Find a situation when the angry person is calmer and in a good mood, and bring a family member. When you do this, you show that you are not having any personal issues. And, if there are other people addressing the angry people’s issues, they will accept that they are only their issues.
15. Be Safe
While coping with an angry person, you need to be sure that you are safe. When people are angry, at times they may become physically violent. So, if you do not feel safe, you need to stay away. Always bear in mind that you need to be safe.
Finally, dealing with angry people needs a lot of patience, skills, and proper behavior. However, the most important thing to remember is that a person acts as they feel. And, angry people suffer, so always try to be kind.