10 Problems That are Linked to Poor Parenting
As a parent, we are probably second-guessing a lot of decisions before making them. Are we too strict, too laid back, not interesting or fun enough? We may even have all these feelings on the same day, fearing that our mistakes can cause serious harm to our child’s emotional and mental development.
The fact is, our actions and words set an example for our children, regardless if they are good or bad. In other words, we affect their thinking, feeling, and acting.
However, knowing the possible mistakes could help prevent us from making them in the first place. What’s more, knowing the results of some parenting mistakes can help us empower and love our children even more.
So, the more aware of them we are, the better we can prevent them.
Here are the most common physiological problems that arise due to poor parenting.
1. Inability to Relax and Rest
If you tell your child things like “Stop goofing around,” and “be serious” every day, they can end up feeling unable to relax around you or anyone.
It’s in their nature to be silly, so if you keep on saying “don’t be such a baby, “or “grow up” they could start feeling unsatisfied with who they are, thus developing anxiety in the long run. When adults, these children will probably worry about other people’s opinions too much.
2. Anxiety & Depression
If you watch and criticize every move your child makes, you are increasing their risk of anxiety and depression later in life. Criticizing and overprotection can make them question their abilities, lack independence, and be afraid of everything.
3. Low Self-Esteem
Constant comparison with other children could lead to an inferiority complex. Phrases like “Why didn’t you get an ‘A’ on the math test like your brother” can shake their self-confidence. Over time, they might end up with low self-esteem, thinking they are not good enough.
4. Harmful Addictions
If you tell your child that s/he causes a lot of problems all the time, s/he may conclude that everyone will be better off without her/him.
So, the child might develop harmful addictions or indulge in extreme sports, putting themselves in dangerous situations all the time thinking they have no value.
5. Lack of Initiative and Suppression of Talents
Children have a lot of dreams, like becoming a superstar or professional football player one day. No matter how unrealistic these dreams might look to you, you should never tell them. In contrast, they will give up on their dreams and suppress their talents.
6. Suppressions of Emotions
If you constantly tell your child to stop complaining or crying, you are making them feel as if their feelings don’t matter. Also, if you as a parent hide your emotions or show a lack of sensitivity, your child could start mimicking your behavior.
So, they might suppress their emotions and become closed off to others, which could bring them a lot of problems later in life.
7. Trust Issues
When children are young, most parents teach them about “stranger danger,” which is helpful. But, if parents continue telling them no one can be trusted, the children might develop trust issues which can affect their relationships later in life.
8. Guilt and Depression
If you keep on reminding your children of what you have sacrificed for them, they might start feeling guilty or depressed.
Believing that they haven’t deserved all the things they enjoy, like clothes, education, and a nice house could make them feel unworthy. What’s worse, they can feel this way even when they become adults.
9. Search for a Parent-Partner
If you constantly tell your children they are too young for something they will grow into kidult. They will be dependent on you even in their adult life, thus staying too young for most things in life.
10. Lack of Independence
Overprotective and over-controlling parents often end up having immature and irresponsible children with a lack of independence.
In other words, if you keep your child too close to you all the time, not letting them do anything exciting or fun with their friends could end up holding them back later in life.
So, your child will always be dependent on others, not able to make their own decisions due to fear of change.
Here’s a short video that shows a simple way to teach your children independence.