7 Things We Learn After the Loss of Our Parent At a Young Age
Those who have lost a parent at a young age know how hard and life-changing that event can be. When the news comes, it feels as the world is shattered. It is a truly traumatic event that changes how we see the world.
It changes the way we see people around us, and, it changes who we are.
The first year is usually a year filled with heartache and gut-wrenching pain. But through the experience, you get some hard-learned lessons that will stay with you forever.
#1 People That Haven’t Gone Through This Don’t Get It, and You Shouldn’t Blame Them
Yes, it is hard to feel as no one understands you, but you should learn that it is not their fault.
You might be bitter since you will see that people don’t entirely get it. They might not fully understand what you are going through, what you need or feel no matter how much they try to support you.
But, understand that it is not their fault. You will learn this eventually. It might be hard to accept it, but it is not their fault.
Surely you don’t wish this experience on anyone, and you should be grateful that people your age and close relatives never had to go through this type of pain.
#2 You Will Understand Who Is Real and Who Is Not
Despite those who do or say the wrong things, with time you will understand who really is there for you and who cares about you. Remember that tragedy always shows you who your true friends are.
Many people might walk away because they cannot handle it. You should let them go. Because a real friend stays no matter how good or bad it is.
Your parent’s death can be a hard thing to accept, that is why you need all the support and love you can get. With time you will learn that those who walked away have just done you a favor by doing that.
#3 It Is OK Not to Be OK
Understand that it is okay not to be okay, no matter how much you try to stay strong. You will learn to accept that; you will admit that you were in pain and that you weren’t okay.
It is entirely reasonable to express this to people without being judged. This is a lesson that isn’t easy to learn.
#4 The Relationships Between Loved Ones Become Stronger
People that understand what you are really going through become close to you. They are the ones that know what you have lost and all the weight you continuously carry with you on a daily basis.
And now you understand how quickly we can lose someone; you know that now when you have lost the most critical person when young- your parent.
That makes you love and cherish MORE all the people in your life, and therefore your relationships with them get stronger. This loss shows how essential all people in life are to you.
#5 Important Life Events and Holidays Will Never Be the Same
The first holidays and significant life events after the loss of a loved one are the hardest. This event will change the meaning of these events forever. You will notice that there is an emptiness due to their absence.
You are going to miss them and wish they were there. Understand that this is an emptiness that will never be filled. Also, it brings to the surface all the memories of the traditions of holidays, and that can be painful.
People around with the holiday cheer cannot understand that these days are painful for you and your family.
#6 You Don’t Waste Time No More
In a way, this event opens your eyes and makes you understand that we only live once and that is not forever. Time is ticking away. Therefore, you shouldn’t settle for less than you truly deserve and you should never waste time.
This will make you more upfront and honest with the people around you since you understand that there is no time wasting yours and other people’s time.
You have overcome the loss of someone important, so no, you don’t settle for less. Now you understand how vital your life and time is. And you want to spend it with the right people.
#7 Now You Live Life More
You can see that you live life more, but that is only because you are aware of how soon it can all go away. After losing a loved one, you sit and just think of all the lost times and chances you might have had with them.
We would all give anything for one more lunch, road trip, adventure and day with them. That is why you might become more apt to do things with others. You begin to understand how important time and adventure spend with people are.
You being to seek things that bring meaning to your life. You want to make the loss of your parent worth it by experiencing life for them as well.
With this event, you learn to appreciate every good thing and disregard the bad things because nothing compares to what has been. You learn what matters in life and what doesn’t. The meaning of life for you has changed forever.
Not a day will pass by without thinking of your parent. This experience will change you to the core, how you interact with people around you, how you see life, and yourself.
You will carry the weight of this event, but you will also carry the lessons you have learned because of this tragedy.
We cannot turn back time, but we can do our best to look in the future and make sure we are the best possible version for ourselves and for our parent as well.