To Everyone Whose Partner Has Anxiety – They Are Not Broken
Living with anxiety is not easy, so is living with someone who has anxiety. The condition is hard for both partners, no matter who has it. One of them is living with a little voice in their head which makes them worried all the time.
At the same time, the other is living with a person whose behavior is not always easy to understand.
This article is about the person whose partner has anxiety.
You know that your partner has anxiety, no matter if they’ve told you or you’ve noticed it yourself. Either way, you have to know a few things about them.
Anxiety is not consistent. You might think your partner has just snapped at you, but that was their anxiety. You might think they are unhappy when you go out, and you blame yourself for that, but it was their anxiety.
You might think they are angry or mad, but once again, it was anxiety.
You might wonder why they don’t believe you when you say you think ‘nothing,’ but that’s because their mind never stops racing. Their wandering mind makes sure they always think about something, and that’s why they are always tired.
It’s the same story every day. They never have a day off from their anxiety. It’s always here to keep them worried that something will go wrong.
You might have suggested to go out somewhere together, but they refused. It’s not that they don’t want to spend some time with you or have fun, but they are afraid of falls, deaths, cars spinning out of control, crowds, kidnapping, and what not.
And when they stay home alone, they bombard you with messages giving you a detailed description of their emotions and thoughts. They know you can’t do anything, but they still text you – it’s their way to feel better because they know they are helpless as well.
Sometimes they wonder why you are still with them, whether you regret being with them, or if you wish you were with someone else that doesn’t have anxiety.
The whole situation must be difficult for you. And, it’s difficult to see your loved one hurt too. But, never doubt that they see you, understand you, or worry about you. Sometimes they even get anxiety about you.
They know you want to fix them, but you can’t. They are not broken, so it’s not your fault that you can’t help them in that way.
However, there is something you can do to help them. See what triggers their anxiety and try to help them avoid such events. And, when something gets too much for them, be there to hold their hand and tell them that everything is going to be fine.
Tell them that they are not alone and to just breathe.
If you see they get overwhelmed when they have too many things to do, encourage them to take it slowly. Cancel dinner, don’t go to a party, or reschedule their appointments. And if they decide to do all this by themselves, don’t make them feel guilty. Tell them that it’s fine.
When you see them struggling, take the kids out and tell them to take time out for themselves. If they are worse when they have less sleep, don’t let them stay awake if the kids are awake. Take over and tell them to go to sleep.
If you are just patient with them, especially in situations when they don’t know what they need, they will feel your love. And, that will calm them down.
If you get angry or frustrated, you won’t help them. You’ll only aggravate the situation, and you both will end up feeling miserable.
Anxiety is ripping them apart. They want to be carefree once again instead of being a prisoner to their anxiety. They want that little voice in their head to go away. But, it doesn’t.
There will be bad days, and there will be good days. But, you should always celebrate them. They are scared and vulnerable. But, they’ve chosen you to share their deepest secret that exposes their most sensitive side.
They know that only you can accept them with all their imperfections. They love you with all their heart, and if you love them as well, be by their side. When they see this, they will be loyal to you forever.
Just hold their hand and tell them that you are with them.